American Heathen®

(This is a transcript of Al Stefanlelli’s “Voice Of Reason” segment on my American Heathen® Internet Radio Show)

I get many different reactions from people who discover that I’m not a religious man, which is an understatement. No matter what has led to our conversation and often-ensuing debate on matters of religious belief, their exasperated finale usually ends up with something close to, “Why don’t you just believe?” They don’t seem to understand that they are requesting me to abandon or discount everything that I have learned about the sciences over the past twenty-five years. I am asked to believe in a religion based on a book that, as Dan Barker points out,

“has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories.” 

This action, to me, is completely unthinkable. There is a definition of Fundamental Christianity floating around on the Internet, and I laugh whenever I come across it, and thus I will share it with you: 

“Christianity is the belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree”

As blasphemous as that is to the faithful, there is a lot of truth in it, and it’s in this truth that I find the irony of the philosophical trade that I am consistently asked to make. Fact is, I am not a superstitious fellow. I am an atheist. My opinions about religion are based on reason, not doctrines, dogmas, superstitions or other sectarian authorities. I pay no homage to messiahs, creeds or holy books, nor do I consider mystical revelations or blind faith as valid. I understand truth to be how any given statement corresponds with rational thought and empirical evidence. Reason is my ally and it is a powerful one. Reason and critical thought are my main tools for comprehension, understanding and truth, which is then confirmed only through the strict tests of the scientific method.

Truth must be testable, and by virtue, must require evidence and repeatable experiments to confirm it, as well as continued attempts to falsify it. The explanation of what results must be in it’s simplest form and free of contradictions. Contrary to what the religious would like you to think, I am a moral person. I measure morality in terms of reason and kindness. The belief that Fundamental Christianity has cornered the market on morality has been repeatedly proved false.

What is moral is simply what doesn’t hurt others. Kindness sums up everything. I base morality on human needs, not imagined “cosmic absolutes.”  To me, a moral dilemma is one that involves a conflict of values. I resolve these conflicts using reason to weigh the outcome of any given situation. Fundamental religion, however, promotes a dangerous and inadequate version of morality that is based on blind obedience, objective ultimatums and juvenile promises of a reward in heaven. The disobedient get threats of everlasting punishment in an utterly gruesome, sadistic place called “hell” for disobedience.

Albert Einstein said,

“Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death.” 

I prefer to base my actions on the consequences to real, living human beings. The wildly popular “Purpose Driven Life,” by Rick Warren, swept the country several years ago. It offered the faithful a reason for their existence on earth. The problem is that religion cannot give your life purpose.  Not even Christianity. Religion can only give you someone else’s interpretation of purpose for your life, or invite you to explore what purpose a non-existent entity has for you. Both of these are inherently dangerous.

We should not forget that crashing airplanes into buildings, shooting physicians who provide legal medical procedures and the be-heading of  disobedient women are faith-based initiatives. These extreme actions are the only logical conclusions that can come from religious fulfillment, if one believes the Judeo – Christian – Islamic holy books are the literal word of their god.

I am confident that the genesis of meaning and purpose absolutely must begin in my mind. The universe is cold, vast and mindless. It does not care about me, you or anyone for that matter.  The caring must come from within us. My sense of purpose comes as the result of compassion, altruism, joy, love and the progression of human knowledge. The fundamentalists insist that there must be a designer and point to human characteristics and the natural world as proof, but life does not demand a designer.

All we need is a reasonable explanation.

Fortunately, the undeniable and proven facts of evolution, including evolutionary psychology, explain everything from altruism to the existence of chaos, ugliness and pain in the universe. My resistance to religion is simple. There exists no empirical evidence to support the existence of gods, goddesses, devils, demons, spooks, spirits, jinns, ghosts, specters, apparitions or anything else supernatural.

As well, there are plenty of good reasons to oppose it.  Religious belief defies reason and cannot be tested. While I believe many fundamentalists are sincere, I also believe they are hallucinating. There is no advantage to believing a lie and there is no excuse for sacrificing logic and reason in favor of superstition. This is unconscionable to me.

I think religion is more harmful than it is worth, as it has been used to justify almost every war ever fought and is responsible for horrific blights on our society. Only through religion have we come to know slavery, sexism, racism, homophobia, mutilations, intolerance and the oppression of millions of minorities. The totalitarianism of religious absolutes choke progress. If you think good deeds are an argument for the existence of religion, consider that even militant terrorist organizations have social programs available for their followers.

The thing is that many believers would be good people even if they had no religion. Religion has no monopoly on good deeds. In fact, the lion’s share of the progress we enjoy is the result of work done by those who are not religious. Edison, Einstein, Darwin, Stanton, Curie, Freud, Russell, Dawkins… The list goes on and on. Contrasting this is the fact that religion has a history of consistent resistance to progress.

Atheism is largely misunderstood. It is not a political position. All of us are not progressive socialists. We come from all walks of life and we don’t have a cohesive organization.  We are Democrats, Libertarians, Republicans, Socialists, Capitalists, Conservatives, Liberals, etc.  A cross-section of humanity.

Atheism is not a religion, either. It is just a lack of belief in the supernatural and it only requires a commitment to skepticism and reason. Religion requires the acceptance of the supernatural,  holy writings, and the conformation to absolutes.

I keep my mind free from religious dogma.  I test ideas and then retest them and then either adopt or discard them based on evidence.  I’m not without emotion, but I am suspect of what contradicts science, refutes reason and is not open to question. What the fundamentalist Christian regularly refers to as  “freedom in Christ” is nothing more than credulous servitude. It is blind obedience to bronze-age superstitions based on ignorance, and propagated by divine tyrants.  The individuals who brought us these dogmas were from a primitive time in our history. They had no concept of anything even remotely consistent with modern science. They did not know where thunder and lighting came from, what caused drought, why an animal had more than one color, why disease existed or what “line of sight” was.

Religion was borne out of the terrified infancy of our species. It is an insult to the collective knowledge of human thought.  It misrepresents the origins of humankind and the cosmos. It demands unreasonable suppression of human nature, inclines people to violence, requires blind submission to authority and is hostile to free inquiry.

Only the freethinker is truly free.

(Editorial Comment from  host RJ Evans on his American Heathen® radio show – Air Date 02/25/12)

This past week my good friend and AH colleague, Chuck, expressed concern for what, he thinks, some listeners might perceive as misogynistic treatment, by me, of my good friend and co-host Amie Quinn. Chuck thought that I might be putting too much emphasis on Amie’s “hot body” during the show. I assured Chuck that Amie and I had a conversation on the subject of sexual exploitation long ago, and had reached a clear and concise agreement as to how Amie’s character would be portrayed on the show. Tonight, I want to talk a little about the subject of sex and the sexes. I want to make my position clear on the subjects of women, men, misogyny, human sexuality, and my approach to these issues on this show.

I’d like to begin by telling you a little about Amie Quinn. Amie is a young mother, wife, and career woman. She’s a professional webmaster. She is also an extremely intelligent woman. I met Amie through her husband, who is a very close friend of mine, before they were married. Later, I was the photographer at their wedding. On their wedding day I saw Amie through my camera lens for the first time, and recognized immediately a star quality of immense proportions. Amie’s beauty and personality were stunning! It wasn’t until much later that I would come to realize that Amie was the perfect fit for this show.

Last year I decided that the show needed more co-hosts. I wanted fresh, young faces and voices. I wanted a man and a woman. After consultations with my producer, Amber Harris, we came up with a list of qualifications for candidates. Shortly thereafter we posted an advertisement on Craigslist. We had a few applicants, but none that really fit our requirements. Then, one evening, while I was looking over the list of requirements, I suddenly realized that Amie fit almost all of the qualities we were looking for in the female candidate. I immediately called Amber. After some brief discussion we decided to invite Amie to interview and audition for the role. Even though Amie and I were good friends, I wasn’t about to treat her any differently than other candidates. She had to jump through our hoops just like everyone else. And, boy did she jump! In fact, she has exceeded our expectations, and those of her fellow co-hosts! Now, I want to point something out… Amie knew from day one that she was representative of women from all walks of life. A young mother, a wife, a career woman, a sex pot… an intelligent, strong, driven human being… all rolled into one. And, she knew that sex sells. Now, there isn’t a single person on this show who doesn’t deserve to be here. No one is here as a “prop”. Let me make that perfectly clear. Amie has earned the right to be here just like everyone else. Yeah, she’s fucking hot. No doubt about it, and hot women sell. But, believe me when I say… and I’ve said it before… Amie’s also very fucking smart. And, she’s not afraid to get dirty. That means she gives shit as well as she takes it. The reason we crack on each other is simple… If you can’t take it, then you don’t have the right to give it. Everyone on this show can take it. That’s because we understand each other, love each other… and more importantly… we respect each other.

Now, let’s get to the meat of my editorial…

Chuck said that he believed that my focus on Amie’s body, here on the show, can be perceived as misogynist. Well, if you’ve haven’t followed this show for more than two weeks, you might get that impression. Sure. But, let’s take a good hard look at me and the issue of misogyny. I think you’ll quickly learn how UN-misogynistic I am. And, you’ll learn something about this show if you’ve never tuned into it before.

I have been married to my wife Sherry for over 29 years. She is the light of my life. Our relationship is contrary to the American ideals of a traditional sexually monogamous marriage. My wife is the bread-winner, a career oriented, type “A” driven personality. I am the home maker, a house husband who supports my wife’s aspirations and dreams, even to my own detriment. In fact, it is I who has relentlessly encouraged my wife to stand up and fight against the old boys network of misogyny in society and the workplace. And, I have done so from day one of our relationship. My wife graduated from college in 1983 with a degree in Electrical Engineering, a field of endeavor with a male to female ratio, at the time, of at least a hundred men to one woman. The environment in engineering wasn’t a warm and welcoming place for a woman back then. While it’s a bit better today, it is far from acceptable. But, from day one, my wife has been determined to prove herself more than capable. The problem back in ’83 was that Sherry started out with the idea that she had to prove herself to the men. I begged to differ with her. I successfully argued that she should never try to prove herself to men, but focus on challenging herself instead. Her work would then speak for itself, and it would be impossible for her male colleagues to ignore. Sherry took my advice. 29 years later, Sherry has clearly shown that she is not only capable of competing with men in the workplace, but exceeding many men in her field of endeavor. She has never been unemployed… not even for a single hour, in her 29 years as an engineer. She is truly in command of her life and her career.

My relationship with my wife is a 50/50 union.  We are absolute equals.  Our love and appreciation for each other doesn’t come with unspoken expectations, and as such, my wife and I don’t suffer from poor communication or jealousy. We talk, and talk about anything that pops into our minds. Nothing is hidden. As far as jealousy… To us, jealousy is an irrational, unreasonable, destructive emotion. Jealousy is born out of the idea that, once you enter into a relationship with someone, there is suddenly an unspoken assumption that you own them, that they are your property.  This type of thinking is toxic to Sherry and I, and this causes us to flatly reject it. We don’t own each other in any sense of the word. We don’t need each other to feel whole, complete, or otherwise good about ourselves. Instead, we choose to share our lives together, and we make that choice independently, for ourselves, again, and again, and again, each and every day. I don’t own Sherry. Sherry doesn’t own me. We simply want to spend our lives together.  Because we retain our individuality and independence, we fully respect each other, and we know we will make reasoned decisions about our relationship everyday. And, every day for the past 29 years we have so far chosen to love, honor, and respect each other based on rules that we have established over the course of our relationship. Our close, personal, emotionally intimate relationship, is not threatened by sexual relationships with others if we so choose. We openly acknowledge the role biology plays in our sex drives, and we understand that the depth of our emotional commitment to one another cannot be penetrated by the shallow nature of a sex act with someone we might find physically attractive. In layman’s terms, we aren’t going to trash our emotional investment/relationship built on a solid foundation of honesty and openness over a flimsy biologically driven sexual attraction or sexual contact. Our relationship is closed emotionally, and open sexually.

Now, many of you will frown upon this arrangement. That is your choice. But, I can assure you that no one is immune to the realities of human sexuality. What christians call temptation of the flesh is always present, whether or not anyone is willing to admit feeling it.  And, nobody should ever be ashamed of feeling it.  It’s a part of being human. My wife and I have chosen to embrace it. However you approach your relationships is entirely your choice. No two relationships are built and forged the same way. Make your own rules, but make sure both of you know what the rules are. In any event, you have your way and we have ours. Which leads me to the reason why I can be mistaken, at times, for being a misogynist…

Because of my open and unencumbered attitude toward sex and sexuality, and my unique relationship with my wife, I have been accused of being a misogynist from time to time. In every case, the accusations and insinuations have been uniformed. They are likely based on comments I have made, or things I have done, filtered through the lens of a conventional, traditional, sexually monogamous marriage. I want to address these false impressions. I want to remove the filter and examine the flaws of this accusation. But, first we have to define what misogyny really is.

According to Wikipedia…

“Misogyny is the hatred of women or girls. According to feminist theory, misogyny can be manifested in numerous ways, including sexual discrimination, denigration of women, violence against women, and sexual objectification of women. Misogyny has been characterized as a prominent feature of the mythologies of the ancient world as well as various religions. In addition, many influential Western philosophers have been described as misogynistic.”

Hatred of women or girls, sexual discrimination, denigration, violence, sexual objectification… Wait… sexual objectification? I certainly agree with the definitions of hatred, discrimination, denigration, and violence, but I’m going to take issue with sexual objectification. Let’s start by getting naked. Not literally, but figuratively. When we strip ourselves of clothing, the objects of our desire are plain to see. Men and women are equipped with different genitalia. The genitalia have evolved to facilitate procreation, the ability to reproduce. The genitalia are not autonomous and require stimulus in order to interact with one another. Where does that stimulus come from? In most cases it starts with visual stimulus. Our eyes are attracted to an object. The object is another human being. Programmed into us by evolution, we are drawn to each other by our physical attributes. Our first impressions are each others bodies. Whether we admit it or not, it IS our physical appearance that stimulates us and attracts us to one another. Our initial interest in each other is pure objectification. We objectify each other every single day of our lives. So, in the end analysis, it isn’t sexual objectification that creates a problem for us,  it is our lack of understanding, and fear of our sexuality, our sexual animal, that creates a negative reaction to objectification. Human-beings are sexual objects. Human-beings are sexual. Human-beings are sex.

My love of sex, my attraction to the female form, and the terrific thrill I get from seeing it clothed or naked, does not a misogynist make me. I certainly do not hate women or girls. I don’t discriminate against women. I do not denigrate women. And, I’m not violent, nor do I condone any violence, toward women. I freely distribute sex jokes and wisecracks to anyone within earshot, regardless of their sex or sexual orientation. So, a misogynist jokester I am not. So, what am I?

What I am is a human being who is totally free of religiously driven repressive sexual dogma – dogma that has polarized societies around the world into two extreme schools of thought. One is religious – the cause of the warping of human sexuality. It seeks to subjugate women, to turn them into sexual slaves and baby making machines void of personality, intelligence and humanity. The other is Political Correctness – a knee jerk reaction to religious zealotry. It seeks to DE-sexualize women, to hinder, to contain and/or remove the human sexual animal that is biologically driven. In my opinion, both schools of thought are in grave error. Ultimately, both seek the same thing… to restrict, control, and hinder human sexuality. As a result, men and women are taught that the opposite sex is, in some way, the enemy, and that a war must be fought. Instead of finding true equality together, the sexes fight for control over each other.  And, this is truly shameful.

Men and women are not naturally at war with one another. But, men and women are at war with one another, and it’s because someone told them they should be. They consciously, or subconsciously, think they are entitled to own each other. This “war between the sexes” cliché passes on from generation to generation like a bad STD outbreak. In its wake are millions of relationships destroyed, countless children emotionally bruised, crushed and abandoned, and a perpetually growing and festering lack of trust between the sexes. We’re still talking about, and having, sex. But, we’re not talking about developing a healthy attitude toward sex or the opposite sex. The talk is anything but healthy or complete in my estimation. And our sex isn’t as relaxing and enjoyable as it probably should be. From where I sit, it’s uptight, anxious, UN-trusting, sexist, paranoid, over zealous, and sexually repressed. How long will it be before we hate each other so much that we stop having sex?  Probably never.  But, will the sex become mechanical and abusive?  How long before we realize that claiming ownership of someone in a relationship is really just a form of slavery – a form of non-gender specific bigotry?

While men and women are different from each other in a few ways, we have much more in common than we think. At our core we are human beings. It doesn’t get any more common and wonderful than that. In my opinion, it is in our best interest as a species dispose of the popular destructive sexist memes and get down to the business of living harmoniously and happily together. We should want each other as opposed to need each other. Our lives together are rich with possibility. But, only if we are confident enough in ourselves to stop trying to own each other, and blame each other for our problems. We are not supposed to be helpless children. We are supposed to be mature, independent, freethinking adults.  So, I say let’s get naked. It’s time to strip our clothes off and enjoy objectifying each other for once. Because when everyone’s naked, our fear of each other has nowhere to hide.

This weekend, your voices are needed now more than ever!

For the past few weeks we’ve been hearing nothing but this eternal NAG from the neo-cons and the theo-cons, spearheaded by a couple of GOP Presidential wannabes.  And this eternal NAG from these groups, we are seeing state legislatures actually turn social progress BACKWARD in states like Oklahoma.

Now is the time for you to speak up.  Atheists, agnostics, free thinkers, freedom-lovers, if you’ve been on the sidelines through all these things, now is the time for you to speak up.  You’ve seen what’s been happening when the eternal NAG is the only voice being heard.

This Saturday’s broadcast of American Heathen® will be special because we will have one subject to talk about… and that involves the various ways our government – large and small – has been giving preferential treatment to religious groups in open defiance to the spirit and the letter of the U.S. Constitution.

And we don’t just want you to listen in… WE WANT YOUR VOICES HEARD!  WE NEED YOUR VOICES TO BE HEARD!

We want you to call in and give us your examples of this practice of giving preferential treatment to religious groups.  Or if you don’t have examples, just call in and give us your thoughts.  Let us know what you think about these intrusions into our lives.

That’s American Heathen® this SATURDAY, 8pm ET, 7pm CT on www.ShockNetRadio.com and simulcast on www.FreethoughtRadio.com and also on iTunes in the Classic Rock portion of the radio player.

It’s not just about The Evolution of a Godless Revolution… this is YOUR revolution too!  And this revolution will not be televised!